2.14.2014

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Happy Valentines Day readers! If you either a) have no plans for Valentines or b) are looking for something to do with your beloved there's one constant you can rely on to be there for you: the movies. Okay, that's a total lie, there are many constants in life you can rely on and many times in fact (especially in February) the movies AREN'T really all that dependable. But hey I caught a couple of preview screenings for some movies today so I decided to write a double review. And if neither of the two new movies appeals to you, there's always The Lego Movie (which I neglected to review last week, so I'll give a short review now...)

WINTER'S TALE - Cue the obligatory sappy romance movie just in time for Valentines....or so I thought. But nothing could truly prepare me for what Winter's Tale actually was. In fact, even as I type this I can't get my head around the preposterousness that was this movie. It's not the type that's mind-numbingly or eye-rollingly bad.....it was the type that was epically and ridiculously bad. I could barely hold it together as I sat in the theater as almost every moment after the first 20 minutes or so I thought "What. The. FREAK. IS THIS??" But hey. It was pretty dang entertaining....just probably not in a way it was meant to be. Do you need an example? [SPOILER highlight to read] Cause of death for the lead actress' character in the film? Death by Colin Farrell sex. Yeah. I mean you have to hand it to her....it's certainly a way to go... [/SPOILER]

Oh, wait you need another example? That didn't convince you? Okay how about this [SPOILER] Will Smith wearing a stylized tee under a blazer playing LUCIFER. It doesn't seem like a good thing when the audience laughs at that reveal... [/SPOILER] I'm truly puzzled why so many solid actors agreed to take part in this movie. Did someone blackmail them and threaten their families or something? I can't quite figure it out. And to think, I could have been seeing the probably equally stupid Endless Love (wait no that's impossible....it would probably have seemed like a masterpiece compared to Winter's Tale.) Don't worry though. My friend Amelia has a rewrite to fix the whole thing. Too bad it's too late now.

ROBOCOP - So remember what I always say about expectations? It's good not to have them. In this case, I had absolutely none (other than thinking this film would probably be pretty awful...) and I was very pleasantly surprised. Sure it's not groundbreaking or particularly memorable, but for an action adventure in February it was pretty solid. The supporting cast is great, and Gary Oldman steals the show. Newcomer (okay he has like 30 credits on IMDb but I've never seen him so I'm gonna call him that anyway...) Joel Kinnaman in the lead role does a fair enough job as well. The movie experience was kind of like watching my brother play Halo for two hours....so if that's your cup of tea check it out. And on an intellectual side I suppose you can ponder the Frankenstein effect of tampering with the human body in the name of science. Go in with low expectations and you'll enjoy it.

THE LEGO MOVIE - When I first saw the previews for this movie I thought it looked incredibly awful. And then? Glowing reviews everywhere I turned. I didn't know what to think. So I had to see it for myself and I found it to be surprisingly delightful. It's a fun little film for people of all ages. I appreciated that the humor steered clear of the low-brow (no fart, poo or booger jokes HALLELUJAH!) and was incredibly clever at the same time (actually that's not a surprise that those two things go hand in hand.)  Kids in my theater just seemed to ADORE it and it had plenty of laughs for everyone else. Bottom line: it's just fun. You can't go wrong mixing Batman with even the teeniest bit of Star Wars amirite?

So yeah. Those are your options this holiday weekend. Or you could always take your chances with Endless Love...

5 comments:

Joey said...

Checking out The Lego Movie tomorrow. Will let you know. Will most definitely take a pass on the other two.

Oh, and hey, that's the girl from Downton Abby that wanted out of the show. Maybe she should have kept the steady paycheck or did she do all right? Just not picking scripts?

Emily said...

She should have kept the steady paycheck. Also it's never a good thing for an actress when the lead actor is prettier than you.

Krissy said...

Drew doesn't even know about The Lego Movie yet, but when he clues in... oh man... he will be BEGGING to see it. Glad it's a good one!

Emily said...

Yeah I think it's basically any little boy's dream come true of a movie. Luckily it's fun for the parents to watch too!

Sarah said...

Ha ha! Now with a review like that, I kind of want to see Winter's Tale now. It sounds verrrrry entertaining!