Top Ten Unwatchables of 2011

See that picture of Ariel? That was probably my reaction when I saw the trailer for each film on this list. Unlike the list in my previous blog post, not only would I never go out of my way to see any of these movies in the theater, I would not even rent them from red box (even if someone else was paying!) In fact, if I can help it I will go my whole lifetime without seeing any of the following movies....

10. Mr. Popper's Penguins - Ugh. Jim Carrey in a family-friendly tale about a man who inherits penguins? How delightful.... sarcasm. I wouldn't go near this movie with a ten-foot pole. Even when I did happen to be in Hollywood at the same time of its premier!

9. Mars Needs Moms. Who in the heck came up with this premise? Probably some mom who hopes someday her kids will appreciate her. Well, if you wrote this movie they probably won't.

8. Tyler Perry presents "Fill in the blank here"Basically, you put that name in any title and I will swear on my life never to watch it. I don't even know what his 2011 movie was that made this list. I don't need to.

7. Zookeeper. This movie basically looks like Dr. Doolittle Night at the Museum + Mall Cop = likely a crapfest.

6. Country Strong. The title alone is enough to deter me from this one, but add the plot of anything to do with country singers? Count me out.

5. Abduction. Taylor Lautner action flick? That can't be good.

4. Transformers 3. After Transformers 2 I don't think I would ever want to watch anything this franchise has to offer up again.

3. Season of the Witch. Starring Nicolas Cage. That's all you need to say really. That and witches? Nosiree, not for me!

2. Jack & Jill. What could be more promising than the average Adam Sandler movie nowadays? Why...put him in drag and have him play two characters. This looks like possibly one of the worst movies of all time...but would I be more willing (I honestly don't know the answer) to sit through it than...

1. The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1. Okay, I have heard this one is watchable for the fact that it is laughably bad but for the mere principle I don't think I could ever watch this. I stand proudly by the fact that I have never watched or read a single Twilight. Does that make me an ignorant hater? Well yes....and haters gonna hate! :)

The End :) Hopefully, I'll get my other list of the ones WORTH seeing soon! But while we're on the topic of bad movies, I'll leave you with this. I can only relate too well!


courtney wightman said...

i wish i would have read this BEFORE i saw transformers ... 3 hours gone, never to return.

seanmackay.net said...

I feel that you should expand your mind a little. One of these movies could very well change your life. Worst case scenario you have a Wicker Man type experience.

Sarah said...

Ha ha! Sean has a good point. Remember how much fun you had with Wicker Man!?

And just you watch and see, once you have kids, you might end up seeing a lot more movies like Mr. Popper's Penguins.

As for the Twilight movies, I've only seen two of them, but they are so melodramatic that they are quite entertaining to watch (in a laughable way, of course).

And on the plus side, I would love to know who did Edward and Bella's wedding pictures because getting her to smile in a picture is QUITE a feat!

Mom said...

Sarah has seen the Twilight Series?????????? I don't know what to make of that!!!!!!I am shaken to the core.

I have to go now.

Amelia said...

Ariel gif = so goood, haha. Also I can't help it I still want to see Mr. Popper's penguins. I read it as a kid and can't help wanting to compare ( I don't know why I always do that to myself).

Anonymous said...

Watch Twilight with Riff Trax. Awesome. (still disturbing) but Awesome! - Michelle

Unknown said...

I did see "Abduction". (hides head in shame) Don't remember how or why, but I promise to never do that again.